Here are some tips, based on things that have worked for many.
1. Seek friends. When we’re feeling lonely, often the best comfort is the presence of loved ones. If possible, seek out their company, and spend some quality time with friends. Talk to them about your feelings. I know it can be difficult to admit to loneliness, but talking to someone about it can truly help. If you have no one to talk to, seek out a hotline in your area, or go to an online forum and anonymously tell people about your loneliness. You’ll feel better for it.
2. Forgive. Sometimes what’s stopping us from making connections with loved ones is the walls we put up… perhaps we’re holding a grudge or there are bad feelings about something that happened in the past. And the only thing keeping us from healing those wounds, and building that bridge, is pride and fear of rejection. So take the leap: throw pride aside, and jump through the wall of fear, and reach out to a loved one. Forgive them, in your heart, and just reach out. Make that connection. It’s Christmas. Forgive.
3. Open yourself to meeting new people. Another thing that stops us from making those connections with people is that we put up walls between us and those we don’t know intimately. Perhaps there are coworkers or classmates or other acquaintances that could be good friends, but we close ourselves off. Well, resolve to change that, if that’s the case. Open yourself up, and be friendly, and reach out. Sure, it won’t always work out, but it will never work out if you don’t give it a shot.
4. Volunteer. Nothing can remind us about the true spirit of Christmas as well as serving food to the less fortunate. It makes us realize how lucky we are, and feel good helping fellow human beings. Take some time during the holidays to volunteer your time to a good cause, and in doing so not only give of yourself, but open yourself up to these fellow human beings. Then, if it’s as great as I think it will be, continue that throughout the year.
5. Exercise. You’ll see this on many lists because it really works. Exercise is such a great way to lift your mood. If you’re feeling down, get out and get active. You don’t need to hit the gym or go running – play basketball, hit the batting cages, go hiking, anything that gets you active.
6. Pamper yourself. Be Santa to yourself… give yourself the gift of relaxation. Get a massage, or go to a spa, or just set a hot bath and drink some tea or cocoa. However you do it, find a soothing activity and environment and just enjoy yourself.
7. Avoid excessive alcohol. Many people resort to drink this time of year. But instead of bringing the numbness they seek, it usually leads to worse depression. Some alcohol is fine, but keep things in moderation.
8. Spend time with single friends. Sometimes it can be a real downer to hang around with your married friends and family. In addition, they are so focused on their family that they often don’t focus on you. While you shouldn’t shun your loved ones who have families or partners, it’s a good idea to get together with the single friends in your life. Not only can you keep each other company during these tough times, but you can focus on each other more, share commonalities, and have a great time together.
9. Hold a get-together yourself. Don’t wait to be invited – hold a get-together and invite those you’d like to talk to for a little while. Get creative with the food. Keep things simple. Play some great music and have a blast.
Focus on what makes you happy. Perhaps the most important tip of all is, instead of focusing on what you don’t have, and thinking about what makes you sad and depressed, focus on what you love. What makes you happy? If you focus on that, that will be your reality. Sounds corny? It is. But it works.
