Next time you do a knockknock joke, remember that in “Macbeth” you’ll read, “Knock knock! Who’s there?” Or if you’re anxiously waiting “with bated breath,” you’ll be joining Shakespearean characters from “The Merchant of Venice.” If you find yourself in an area where your GPS isn’t working and you get lost, you may go on “a wild goose chase” (“Romeo and Juliet”).
If insomnia grips you some night, and you find yourself saying I have “not slept one wink” (“Cymbeline”) you may feel that the next day you’re as “dead as a doornail” (“Henry VI, Part II”). On such days it’s good not to do much; it’s better to “lie low” (“Much Ado About Nothing”). After all, it’s a “foregone conclusion” (Othello) that you won’t be at your best, and if you jump on the interstate, you might get cut off and “rant” (“Hamlet”). Driving when you’re sleepy is not for the “faint-hearted” (“Henry VI, Part I”).
But if you have a big heart, and if you’re ready to meet Mr. or Ms. Right but have no prospects – “there’s the rub” (“Hamlet”) – you sign on with a dating site. Don’t be like those for whom that means “the game is afoot” (“Henry IV, Part I”), so don’t “play fast and loose” (“King John”). That’s not you. Upon meeting your date, you’ll want to “break the ice” (“The Taming of the Shrew”), and charm this person, so remember that “brevity is the soul of wit” (“Hamlet”). In your “heart of hearts” (“Hamlet”) you’ll know if s/he is right for you, especially if you’ve been visualizing your ideal mate in your “mind’s eye” (“Ham let”). You can always talk to your life coach about this person because sometimes “love is blind” (“The Merchant of Venice”).
“As good luck would have it” (“The Merry Wives of Windsor)” and things work out well, you’ll soon fall in love; simply gazing at that person you might become “bedazzled” (“The Taming of the Shrew”), and feel so blessed that “such stuff as dreams are made on” (“The Tempest”), and you might feel as if “the world’s mine oyster” (“The Merry Wives of Windsor”). If s/he prepares a meal for you, and it will be “a dish fit for the gods” (“Julius Caesar”), your love may be growing so sweetly and quickly that you may “wear your heart on your sleeve” (“Othello”), especially if/she has “a heart of gold” (“Henry V”).
In “one fell swoop” (“Macbeth”) you may have a dating partner and a fiancée, for this person may be the “be-all and the end-all” (“Macbeth”). S/he may be filled with the “milk of human kindness” (“Macbeth”), whose looks can just “kill with kindness” (“The Taming of the Shrew”), in which case you won’t be any longer “fancy-free” (“A Midsummer Night’s Dream”).
Your parents might say to you “For goodness’ sake” (“Henry VIII”), get married. If you do, and you’re “eaten out of house and home” (“Henry IV, Part II”) you may have to break up and say “good riddance” (“Troilus and Cressida”), and “send him packing” (“Henry IV”). Hopefully, you won’t have had a child by then – your “own flesh and blood” (“Hamlet”). And if a divorce and custody battle ensue, you’re too big a person to “refuse to budge an inch” (“Measure for Measure/The Taming of the Shrew”). You’ll have to “give the devil his due” (“Henry IV, Part I”), and strive for the best interest of all concerned, speak the “naked truth” (“Love’s Labour’s Lost”) because the “truth will out” anyway (“The Merchant of Venice”).
Even if you don’t like your soon-to-be ex, you’ll need to trust the judge’s decision; you’ll have to because, as he might be thinking to himself, “There’s method in my madness” (“Hamlet”). And if he’s fair, your spouse won’t get “too much of a good thing” (“As You Like It”), and you won’t be left financially strapped so that you’ll feel like you’re back in your “salad days” (“Antony and Cleopatra”). But trust the judge and your spouse and you can wind up maintaining your “spotless reputation” (“Richard II”). If not, you may have to leave town and “vanish into thin air” (“Othello”). In which case you’ll be single again in a new place and will have come “full circle” (“King Lear”). With all of that behind you, you can look in the mirror and say, “All’s well that ends well” – naturally from the great play of the same name.
